Love unveiled – polarity & motherhood in spiritual awakening (transcript)

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Episode Transcript:

Lian (00:01)

Hello my beautiful mythical old souls and a huge one welcome back. Could love in its rawest most vulnerable form be both our greatest teacher and also a path to spirit? Well in this episode I'm joined by the luminous Londin Angel Winters, an author, teacher and thought leader in sacred intimacy. Together we explore the realms of intimacy, polarity, motherhood and sacred sexuality.

Londin shares how her childhood intuition shaped her journey to becoming a devoted practitioner of love. We traverse the intricate dance of polarity in relationships, especially through the transformative crucible of motherhood, where vulnerability and surrender become gateways to spiritual evolution. Our conversation draws upon ancient teachings and lived experiences, revealing the trials and triumphs of maintaining connection and passion.

of missed life's challenges. So this isn't just a conversation about relationships, it's an invitation to you too, to reflect on the delicate balance between structure and energy, trust and love, as you navigate your own intimate path and your path of spirituality.

And before we jump into all of that goodness, I would love to let you know that I soon be opening the doors to my brand new crucible for women called Beauty Potion, the mythical quest for eternal beauty. By that, I really mean the union of inner and outer beauty. You can find out more and register your interest to be one of the first to know when I open it at bemythical.com slash beauty.

And if you're struggling with the challenges of walking your soul path in this crazy modern world and would benefit from guidance, kinship and support, you can join us at our Academy of the Soul, UNIO. You can find out more and join by hopping over to bemythical.com slash UNIO or click the link in the description.

And now back to this week's episode. Let's dive in.

Lian (02:11)

Hello Londin, a huge and very warm and so far already quite hysterical welcome to the show. I'll say to listeners that

Londin Angel Winters (02:23)

Thank you, happy to be here.

Lian (02:32)

We've been talking for about half an hour and already just been in tears of laughter. To the point where, just before we started recording, I had one of those moments of like, can't look at her, can't look at her, because I'll burst out laughing again. I've never experienced that before. But welcome.

Londin Angel Winters (03:00)

Thank you!

Lian (03:01)

So despite the gayity, or maybe it's completely apt, we have got an incredibly rich, deep episode here to be explored and danced through. Before we go wherever it's going to take us, I'd love to know how your story began. How did your origin story begin? And I do want to add a little kind of side question to this. So often when I ask people question like this they will go quite a way back into often childhood. I love that. I love to hear these stories of kind of like how our soul was speaking to us right back in childhood and appreciate because of the topic, because of the work you do, that might be a slightly more challenging question to answer and yet

I still would love to know if you can see that there was a kind of beginning of your origin story right back in childhood.

Londin Angel Winters (04:03)

Hmm, you're so right on track. So I am a teacher of intimacy and more than a teacher or practitioner. I'm a devoted practitioner, daily practice with an intimate partner into the realms of conscious loving and what does that look like? And you might think that starts later, but actually as a child, In my first discovery of my own sexuality by myself in my bedroom, I could hear my partner Justin's voice and his depth of love and his depth of presence. And it amazes me today. It's like, it's like the ultimate deja vu when we're in a moment of the depths of our practice and he will say something to me. And it's exactly what I heard when I was a child. So there's something very mystical going on here in this path of mine. And per usual, know, most people when they talk about being involved in some profoundly mystical life experience, they went way off the reservation before they came back. So as a child, I had this intuition. I had this knowing that there was profound depth available in love

Lian (05:25)

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (05:35)

But then of course I start my journey into everything that is childhood love, know, early adult love, and none of it even remotely is the same.

Lian (05:51)

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (05:52)

I personally retreated into what I call my alpha, what many in the world today would call your masculine. I found that so painful that I, the difference between what I intuited was possible and what was actually available, even as like a high schooler, even as a college, aged person, that I became incredibly focused on my studies. I became incredibly focused on entrepreneurial pursuits. became, I was still very mystical. So I became interested in the world of manifestation and

Lian (06:32)

Hmm

Londin Angel Winters (06:32)

that whole journey of knowing your power as a creatrix. And I was always very excited by it because the divine relationship was what was present through it all. But what was interesting was, I won an Emmy when I was in my early 20s. I created these massive successes. I think I won six. 

awards for professional writing. I was very accomplished at a very young age. And then I had had all these failures in love and relationship and really felt unmet and was dating men that were, they would alternate between being like a total jerk who was sexually exciting to like I was the breadwinner, but I felt safe with the guy. And, you know, it was just like batting between these two realities. everything ending as divorced and it was awful. And then I decided to apply all of my manifestation skills to love. And that worked even worse, you know, because I was like, I'm gonna do this. I'm gonna tackle love, you know what I mean?

Lian (07:41)

Hahaha You used like plot twist, that didn't work.

Londin Angel Winters (07:54)

Yeah, right? Because you can't control the mystical, right? You can't like get in there and order the miracle, right? I don't mean order as in, you can order it. You can say, I'm ready. I'm here to receive, but you don't go in there and micromanage the process, right? You push it so far away from yourself. And that was my early experiences in gender studies, which was like,

Lian (08:00)

Hmmmm

Mm... yes.

Yes.

Londin Angel Winters (08:21)

The feminine does this and the masculine does this and I was like all in because I want love. I'll do it. Never got farther away.

Lian (08:28)

Hmm. Also, I imagine, yeah, and also knowing a bit about you and how you've described yourself back then. I imagine you kind of applied yourself to it in the same way as in like, oh, I can do that. You know, I understand. I've got the task.

Londin Angel Winters (08:45)

Yeah, I was like, you want me to be like dynamic and moving? yeah, I can totally master that. I will dedicate myself to mastering that. Well, that's kind of like sad because what it is is without realising it, you convince yourself that to have the love you want, you have to become this magnificent pretzel of a person. Like, oop, that's very masculine, cut that off, oop.

Lian (08:54)

Mmm.

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (09:14)

supposed to not have an opinion. Let's pretend to be demure, you know, I'm not supposed to show him how powerful I am. Let me act helpless. I mean, it really turned in on itself. And it was a magnificent

Lian (09:19)

Hmm

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (09:35)

house of mirrors because I was achieving a lot of male interest. I was being adored. I was being cherished. I was being worshiped. Really, truly, it worked. All the archetypes of polarity work great. But I was losing my spiritual evolution in the process because I was like clipping my wings left and right. I was only playing one side of the piano, the feminine side.

Lian (10:00)

Yeah.

Londin Angel Winters (10:03)

God forbid I would move over here and animate some of the parts of me that had won an Emmy in the past that had created financial freedom for myself. Like, you I'd held these beautiful talents in the structural realms of penetrating the world with my love that I had completely abandoned. And so what my path in this work has represented is learning how to play all the notes of the piano.

Lian (10:03)

Hmm.

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (10:33)

in a way that creates the depth of sacred sexuality that I adore.

Lian (10:39)

Mm. gorgeous. Yeah, I feel so moved by what you've shared there. And I was thinking, and there's a kind of of course in what I'm about to say, but I could really feel the truth of how, you know, before we started recording, we were talking about how kind of out there in the sort of polarity, intimacy, sacred sexuality world, there can be this tendency to reduce, oversimplify, create these kind of very rigid roles. I love how your story is kind of like that happening for you at an individual level, but is what we can see out there happening at large. It's a real flavour of how this is showing up right now, which I know your path is kind of inspired really of what was going on for you and what that created and what you, I guess, either saw was possible or felt cool towards that was different.

Londin Angel Winters (11:46)

Well, I was doing this with a partner and we believed the sales pitch that if he did all the masculine parts and I did all the feminine parts, we'd have great sex forever. And it's true that the nature of polarity is opposites tremble to come together. So when you pull two things apart that are diametrically opposed, like magnets, they will literally, and the more you pull them apart,

Lian (11:56)

Mm. Yeah.

Londin Angel Winters (12:15)

bigger the tremble. And that's that thing, Eric Gajon called the ziplist F-U-C-K, right? It's that delicious feeling of, you know, my libido had been missing for years, but suddenly I have skin hunger back. I want you. This is interesting to me. There's so many women that are so hardened by being the alpha in their worlds that just to feel that like intense yearning,

Lian (12:17)

Hmm.

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (12:43)

that intense libido and arrows come back online is quite a nectar. And you can start to want more of it. And I wanted as much as I could taste. I was like, this is such a reclamation of something that I knew as a child I wanted to experience. But it was playing with fire. And I didn't quite realize how I could get burned until I was standing.

Lian (12:50)

Mmm.

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (13:11)

in a house that was burning down to the ground, a relationship that was burning down to the ground. And I was like, wait a minute, what happened to my evolution as a spiritual being? Like now I'm just this glorious puppet who's having tremendous sex. And my husband felt the same. He was going, what happened to me? I used to be such a...

Lian (13:23)

Hmm.

Londin Angel Winters (13:37)

wider human and now I'm just trying to show up as this perfect alpha all the time and we became like bad tennis partners where it's like you missed the serve, no you missed the serve. Like if your feminine was more surrendered then I could really show up and you know and I was like well if you didn't forget to bring home the milk then I wouldn't have lost trust you know. It was getting ridiculous. But Justin and I love polarity.

Lian (13:50)

Mm.

you

Londin Angel Winters (14:07)

And we love the depth that is available when you split two pieces apart. And so our whole path for the last 10 years has been how to preserve the beauty of these teachings, but also do it in a way where both partners are at the edge of their spiritual development, meaning you're deepening in consciousness and love. You're both, and you're both together. but not the same and all of our books are about this.

Lian (14:41)

I love this so much. And really that comes to the point that I just felt you were the perfect person to explore this with in that, ironically, really, even when this kind of work is done with an understanding of, say, spirituality, it can seem that it takes people further away from that kind of true embodied spirituality, which, however we might describe it in so many different spiritual traditions, ultimately is about union within.

It might be expressed with another, it can be expressed in lots and lots of different ways, but ultimately that's what's happening, you know, the deeper we go on that path of consciousness is union within. And that seems to somehow get forgotten or sort of tossed. by the wayside in much of this work. And I felt that there was something in the way that you're journeying on this path where it's at the heart of it. It's not a kind of, it's a kind of nice little side order that might sometimes get a look in. It's like at the heart, it's kind of the, it's the North Star of your path. And I can really feel that in you. So that's the conversation I would love to have now. I guess let's...I think something that occurs to me to look at, and I'd love to know your thoughts on this, it seems to me that there are so many ways we can walk that path, that kind of path towards the divine, let's say. And it seems that some of us, to some extent or other, have a path that one way or another includes sacred sexuality. It doesn't mean that's for everyone, and I think some ways this is kind of… where polarity has sort of become like, this is the panacea to having a good relationship and kind of losing the kind of where it began from. But again, I don't see that this is necessarily for everyone, but for those called, it's I think probably a vital part of someone's, what someone's soul came here for and how they came to walk the path. So I'd love to know your sense.

Londin Angel Winters (16:57)

Hmm.

Lian (17:01)

of that, like why this might be for certain people and not for others.

Londin Angel Winters (17:06)

Hmm.

My experience, I've been teaching for a very long time, worked with hundreds of people. It's some of the deepest work there is to do. And I think when you're called to it, when you feel the heat of it all, and I'll say more about what I mean, but when the heat rises, there's like a part of your higher self saying, keep showing up, keep showing up. And what I've noticed is for people who don't necessarily have that. unknown part inviting them back. They shy away as soon as they feel what this really is. And the reason why sacred sexuality is such an intense path is let's say you want to evolve spiritually and you get involved in a teaching. Well, when you're ready, you know, you read the books and when it's class time, you go and you sit on the cushion and you meditate. And You know you're going to the class and so you gear up And And And when your coach, your guru, your teacher is around, you mentally prepare to do that work.

When you get into making your partner, your intimate partner is your guru, meaning that's your spiritual path is to show up to intimacy with depth, with real raw honest relating and with sensuality present. That's gonna be there 24/7.

To be in a truly depth-based intimate relationship where you're teaching, where you're living, where you're practicing relationship as a sadhana.

Lian (18:52)

Mm-hmm.

Londin Angel Winters (19:07)

You know, he's going to catch you when you don't feel like doing it. He's going to trigger you in a way you didn't even know to ask your teacher. everything you're out of control. You're literally out of control because relationship is on you and you're not driving the moment. The moment is on you. And that requires this word, And this word I think is what separates the people who this is appropriate for and those who it's not. 'surrender'. To do this path, you have to really embrace the idea of surrender. And I don't mean surrender as submission. Oh, you make him the leader and you're the follower. A lot of those more dogmatic polarity ideas. That's not what I'm talking about at all. I'm talking about surrender to the creator, showing you how you close to love in any given moment.

Lian (20:03)

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (20:04)

Sit in front of your beloved when he does something to lose your trust. Bring awareness of what your body does in that moment. You find out everything you needed to know about your childhood definition of how to earn love and lose it.

Lian (20:20)

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (20:22)

Meaning we all as children are like AI computers figuring out what gets our parents attention and what loses it. And then we bring that into our future intimacies and we sell ourselves out to get love and we sell ourselves out to avoid losing love. And then when the love is present, we can't even show up to it because we're afraid of getting hurt. And that's why I think

Lian (20:48)

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (20:51)

intimate relationship can be the ultimate path to spiritual evolution because it's really truly your relationship with love itself.

Lian (21:02)

Hmm.

Londin Angel Winters (21:04)

And surrendering into love itself, not surrendering into him, surrendering into the thing that is moving through you that is the truth between you and him. And that's the scariest thing to do.

Lian (21:16)

yes, yes, yes, as you were talking, I was so present to the...

Every time I go to say a word, I'm like, no, it's not quite that, it's more than that. So I'm probably, I'm going to try a different direction. So as we were talking about before we started recording, you wrote one book, had some experiences or two, and then wrote another book. And...

Londin Angel Winters (21:37)

You

Lian (21:48)

one of the experiences or two included having a baby. And as we, and this is where the hilarity started, I think, as we were talking about, if there's anything that's gonna bring us to like, what's real, what's true, it's going to be having a baby and all that comes with that. And I was trying to kind of like capture that in a sort of succinct way and there wasn't a way. So that's kind of what I would love to talk about because there's, can so feel how that truth has been kind of forged within you through those experiences. Because I think there can be a way that what you just described, we can kind of play at our fantasy of that. And then there's a point and it can come in many forms. But I think it's again, motherhood is certainly one of those ones that really brings us present to what's real, where there just isn't, we can no longer. keep upholding those fantasy ideals of, you know, this is how I am, I am practicing in this way. And, you know, the relationship is my temple. And yet there is, as these things are no longer become available, we see what we're actually left with. So I'd love to hear your sense in terms of the difference between, and again, it's not the books are just kind of nice ways to sort of gesture at these different stages of your evolution. But what was the difference?

Londin Angel Winters (23:17)

Brilliant question. So when I wrote my first book, The Awakened Woman's Guide to Everlasting Love, I thought I was bringing this gift of setting women free from performing. I call it dancing for your dinner. You you learn the rules of what creates attraction and then there's some part of your love driven being that just cannot help, but

Lian (23:27)

Hmm.

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (23:43)

Be happy, horny and grateful, because you find out that's the vibe that he loves, you know? And you're just, you think you're being your full true self, but there's elements where you're definitely bringing the thing that makes it all feel nice and glowy. And it was funny, because I wrote that book, The Awakened Woman's Guide to Everlasting Love, to try and say to women, like, hey, there's room for your full self, like,

Lian (23:47)

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (24:10)

Let's say anger isn't something you know how to bring and not lose love. And I wrote all of these stories about how I would bring anger and it would lead to like radical lovemaking. I told stories about how Justin and I did a whole year where every fight had to lead to lovemaking. And Justin and I had this whole journey of awakening to our understanding of what sacred sexuality or sexual yoga is. And then we got pregnant.

And pregnancy alone started a whole new level of awakening because I was 47. I got pregnant, know, Justin kicked one past the goalie in triple overtime. It was very hard to be pregnant at 47 and all of that energy. So one of the concepts of polarity is the man's the structure.

Lian (24:41)

You

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (25:05)

and the woman is the energy. That's a more dogmatic understanding of it. But I was fully bought into that. So I was always bringing him all of these energies and you know, da da da da da, and he loved it and then he would structure it. So it's like, if I was like thunder and lightning, he'd be like, bring it on, baby, I'm here for this. And we had crazy lovemaking doing these games. But now imagine me at 47 years old, giant, giantly pregnant with

Lian (25:15)

Mmm.

Hehehehe

There.

Londin Angel Winters (25:35)

A bowling ball sitting on my cervix just ouch pretty much all the time exhausted. would take these naps where I would just I could fall asleep in a train station and wake up three hours later. You know, I was so tired. And then I start to look at this idea on the energy and he's the structure, you know.

Lian (25:49)

No.

Londin Angel Winters (26:07)

Insert panic, you know, my life is over right? How is this ever gonna work? How's this gonna work, you know and so what What the beauty of sexual yoga is is it teaches you? Yes. Mm-hmm

Lian (26:22)

you a question there. Did you have, you know, you just like how's this ever going to work? Did you have that? Did you have a genuine concern? You know, our relationships been built on this, it's flourished on this particular dynamic, which now very much doesn't seem available. I loved your description, giantly pregnant. very descriptive I really got a visual there so from that place did you have that genuine like how on earth will this work

Londin Angel Winters (27:07)

Absolutely. Just because you're a teacher of sexual yoga, I'm also a practitioner. I'm also just a woman who wants to be loved. And polarity is an on-off type situation in the sense that every woman I'm sure knows when her man is undressing her with his eyes. Like when you're sitting across the table and he's looking over at you, like I just...

Lian (27:09)

Mm-hmm.

Hmm.

Hmm.

Londin Angel Winters (27:37)

I've known you for 10 years, but I feel like I just met you and I need to have you. That's the best feeling in the world. He's present. He's interested. He's engaged. And he's bringing his full fire to the connection. And you know what? When polarity is not present in a moment, you feel him sitting there dead.

Lian (27:41)

Mmm.

Mm.

Yeah.

Londin Angel Winters (28:02)

You know, you feel him looking at you like I've been with you for 10 years. How many times have I made love to you? 

And like, you know, I'm sitting there 40, 47, giantly pregnant and like a 22 year old waitress comes up and is like, Justin's really good looking, you know? Those are tough moments for any woman. And you start to feel, so, you know, in the, in the divine energies, there's alpha and omega and alpha likes to be trusted and omega loves to be loved. and Omega loves to be seen. And when your man loses polarity for you, it's like he's looking through you. He might be so loyal. He might be the greatest guy in the world and isn't going anywhere. Like that 22 year old waitress comes up, Justin doesn't even like check her out. But he's still seeing through me because there's no polarity.

Lian (28:41)

Mmm.

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (28:59)

And, you know, in my books, as you know, I write stories where I give you this moment in detail so you can really feel my side of it, which is just like panic. It's just like, my God, is this whole thing dead? Is there room to have a baby and be a polarity couple? And, you know, I say in the book, like, in that moment, this is a true story. Like in that moment,

Lian (29:05)

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (29:25)

of me just feeling hopelessly invisible and huge and tired and dead. I remember, my God, I don't think I know, and this was a long time ago, there's many more polarity couples now, but back then I was like, wait a minute, I don't know a single polarity couple that has kids.

Lian (29:42)

D-D-D-D-

Londin Angel Winters (29:51)

And you know what? Come to think of it, none of my teachers were even married.

Lian (29:55)

my gosh, it's so true. Like you say, it's not that there are none, but certainly I would say it does seem as though, yeah. Yeah.

Londin Angel Winters (30:02)

Back then, back then there were none. This was like years and years ago, right? Now there's still very few. You know why? Because kids are hardcore depolarizing. Because all that free time you had to do the dance of structure and energy and you know, radiant love meets grounded consciousness, you know?

Lian (30:09)

Mmm.

Mmm, yeah.

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (30:31)

All that time you had is, you know.

Lian (30:33)

And on top of that, you've got all of the... I mean, when we were talking before recording, I've got a memory of you doing an impression of like the breast pump noise. I told the story of one of my friends woke up after a night where you kind of... for anyone listening who has a breastfed, you wear these like pads to stop milk going everywhere and she woke up.

Londin Angel Winters (30:35)

Vaporize.

Lian (31:03)

turned and her husband was fast asleep with a a breast pad stuck to his stubble. So you've got that! It's not just a lack of time! You've got that stuff going on!

Londin Angel Winters (31:15)

Seriously, you've got that. And then the baby's gonna cry two hours later. You know, like if we engage in it, if you're lucky. So my whole, I thought I was being, I'm in total transparency. Like after I wrote Awakened Woman's Guide, I thought I was being real, real honest. I thought I was being transparent.

Lian (31:20)

If you're lucky, if you're lucky.

Mmm. I can feel that in the book. Yes, I don't feel you were that you can so feel your intention was that.

Londin Angel Winters (31:45)

Yeah, because for me at that time, the big breakthrough was to show him I was hurt, show him I was angry, show him I didn't like what he was doing. You know, that was my, you know, I love the way you said that your listeners have watched you go through your spiritual journey and you know, so have my followers. And like at the time of the Awaken Woman's Guide, my big breakthroughs were just to say I was angry because...

Lian (31:50)

Mmm.

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (32:09)

When I said I was angry in my childhood home, my dad would leave the house. He was like, well, we don't do that here. And I learned if you show that you're angry, you lose love. back when I wrote Awakened Woman's Guide, my big breakthroughs were about like, Justin, I'm angry. know, Justin, I just lost trust because it you arc with another woman. You know, those were my big breakthroughs. Then I have...

Lian (32:13)

Mmm.

Mm.

Londin Angel Winters (32:37)

pregnancy and childbirth and infancy. And now I'm faced with a whole new set of spiritual challenges, which is hopelessly vulnerable. Not able to like think I'm bringing my game when I'm, you know, I've got two breast pumps and like, you know, and I need a bunch of chores from him. Like I can't do this alone.

Lian (33:04)

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (33:06)

And I'm even more tired if I thought I was tired when I was pregnant. Now I'm exhausted because I haven't slept through the night because I'm nursing. And I was 48 years old at the time. I had a baby so late in life. mean, it was devastating to the omega parts of me. And my daughter is this glowing love bomb. I mean, she is

Lian (33:26)

Hmm.

Londin Angel Winters (33:35)

essentially like heaven in a swaddle and my husband's attention's going to her, right? And now I'm sitting there kind of beaten up, bloody bruised, and I have this omega that I can't even remotely compete with. And what's beautiful about

Lian (33:52)

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (33:58)

I'll say like, I never think of myself as a teacher because I don't want to be a teacher who stops learning. I don't want to think I have to have the answers. I always think of myself on this journey as a practitioner because what matters to me is this thing I have going with Justin. And if I'm not willing to look like humble myself into my struggles, I'm not going to keep learning. So what was beautiful at the time is I was just like, okay, I'm back at the learning curve again.

Lian (34:15)

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (34:29)

And where is, how am I radiant love in this space? How am I, and I go back to the word that has saved me every time, surrender. I surrendered into the vulnerability of needing him more than ever before. I surrendered into letting all my false beliefs about what is beautiful go because I could no longer be those things like

Lian (34:57)

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (34:58)

I didn't have the body that I could rely on. You know, my body would have been beaten up by pregnancy. I didn't have the free time to like fluff myself up into certain energies that are fun for us. It took all of that theatrics away. But what it gave me back was the pulsing throb of vulnerable, real, raw, surrendered relating. 

where I just looked at him and said, help. You know, like on the day that I went into labour, I had Ava at home and it was a 24 hour labour. And I looked at Justin after that first contraction and I just said, help. And he spooned me and started breathing me. You know, one of the big practices in sexual yoga is the man breathes the woman into her pelvis and she inhales that.

up. And we did that practice for 24 hours straight. It was like he was a part of the birth too. And then that just continued through infancy. Rather than getting mad and against each other, I would just look at him and I would just say, I'm crumbling. I need you. And he would meet me there. And then when I felt ready to make love again and I felt so invisible, so kind of like

Lian (36:06)

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (36:28)

at everyone else's service because when you're a mom you're the hostess with the mostess you know. I would look at Justin and say I can't feel the lover that I am and he would be like meet and he would be like meet me in the practice room and we would hire a babysitter and I would take an hour and he would just make eye contact breathe down my front say I'm here I'm not going anywhere.

Lian (36:31)

Mm.

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (36:57)

and I had no obligation to be turned on. It was like he was just offering me the gift of his presence. And I was giving him the truth of my vulnerability surrendered in softness. And we would just repair and we would reconnect as lovers. And then we would walk back into the chaos of a one-year-old united. And it's just been like that all along. And as a result,

Lian (37:22)

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (37:27)

Having a baby was one of the best things that could happen to me, ironically, as a polarity teacher, because now I understand what really creates polarity, and it's not the archetypes. The archetypes are fun. I describe the archetypes like, you know, move for anything you're going to hear about the way you should be. It's like archetype stuff. So like move for him, sound for him, you know, those are beautiful things. And they're like candy. They're fun to eat as a couple. 

You know, he doesn't move, she moves. He's this, she's the opposite. Those are candy. But what I discovered is that the true nature of polarity is trust meets love. You trust him to show him your deep, vulnerable heart. You're yearning, yoni. The part of you that you think is too much, you show him that. And he learns how to love

Lian (37:58)

Mm.

Londin Angel Winters (38:25)

your insatiable demand. So you learn how to trust what you can trust in him and surrender into that piece. and he learns how to love that it's just never going to be enough for you. And you're always going to want more. And you have this crazy yearning to know love in this lifetime, conscious love. And as a result, those first three years of her life were my best love making.

Because I couldn't bring everything I thought I was supposed to bring and I found out that love is unconditional.

Lian (39:03)

Hmm.

Londin Angel Winters (39:04)

And If it's not unconditional, it's games. Games. Games of sensation. When it's unconditional, you're touching the thing that relaxes the soul into true purpose. Like, I'm actually living in awakening. Am I awakened? No. But I'm living in a moment of awakening and that just, I'm on track.

Like I'm having the experience that came here to have and that kind of circles back to your very original question of like the soul is looking for something. And when you surrender perfectly in conscious love, the soul is like, yes, yes, this is what we knew was possible. Even with these bodies, even with these delusions.

Lian (39:44)

Mmm.

yeah.

Londin Angel Winters (40:01)

Unconditional conscious love is the thing. Some of that other stuff is just candy, but when you eat too much candy you get sick, you know

Lian (40:13)

Yeah, I love everything you've shared so much. There was a word you used earlier. You said something like, it was just theatrics. What I was hearing in what you were sharing was firstly going back to something you said earlier, that we can miss that the devotion, the surrender is actually to love itself. It comes in the form of the man, the relationship, but ultimately the deepest surrender, the deepest devotion is to love itself, which of course is to unconditional love itself. But the the very theatrics that we think we need to inhabit are conditions, the conditions we're putting in the way of experiencing the love that we are devoted to. And there's just something so simple, but so precious in what you've just shared then, how it's brought you so present to the truth of this in a way that, again, going back to when you wrote your first book it was it's so easy to think we are doing the thing because I really I really I really get that you did think you were doing the thing

Londin Angel Winters (41:40)

Totally! I wrote that book from the bottom of my heart from where I was at, you know?

Lian (41:46)

and yet it's just, it's so huge. I think this is really where I'm getting to. It doesn't really matter what the path is. It's so human of us to have these ideas that we think we're doing the thing and yet it's kind of, you know, like playing at these roles, these theatrics and they may well be, and this is something I'd love to your sense of, they may well be...a vital step on the path. It might be that we can't actually kind of jump over that stage. Perhaps we need that kind of sort of living out these fantasy ideas before we're ready to step beyond them. I'd love to know your sense of that.

Londin Angel Winters (42:31)

My honest answer is I don't think so because having mentored couples with Justin, mentored women by myself, as Justin and I evolve in our understanding of what this thing is, this je ne sais quoi, right? Like we're, we practice and we learn from our practice and that's really where all the books come from, all the practices.

So we're sort of like always untangling the mystery school. But as we've evolved, it's become simpler and simpler and simpler as any real spiritual deep truth is, right? And what we notice is the people who are coming to us now, when it's given to them in such a simple way, they can so simply. Like we had a practice on our Patreon on Friday night for couples. And you just saw, I mean, nobody on the recording, you don't see the checkerboard, but Justin and have a checkerboard of people practicing. And the brand newbies are getting it as much as the people who've studied with us for 10 years. Because, and I can go to like how we've simplified it if you want me to do a little teaching, it's all in the new book, but when you understand these ideas,

Lian (43:45)

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (43:58)

at their most fundamental level. It's something that you already are. There's nothing you're trying to achieve and you're not fixed trying to, you're not broken trying to fix. It's something that you already are and it's just relaxing enough to let that bloom.

Lian (44:15)

Hmm.

Londin Angel Winters (44:23)

And when it blooms and the surrender into the bloom for him and her, the bodies begin, it's kind of like childbirth. Like the body already knows what to do. You get out of the way and the body does the thing. And so I think that we're evolving as a collective and the people coming into polarity work now with right understanding are standing on the shoulders of the people who kind of like worked it out. Cause remember, These teachings are ancient. I mean ancient. And they came over in the West and they were misused and misunderstood. And there was a lot of like trickery that went on with it and a lot of chaos that went on with it. But it's all kind of coming into this like really precious return to the original teachings.

Lian (45:21)

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (45:21)

in their most simplified form. And when you have two people who show up like ready to do the work without They can find depth rather quickly with each other. And it's really gratifying to see because that's the nature of the truth is it's actually very simple. It's just how willing you are to surrender in the moment because it's like it's who you are. And then there's this debris on top. And when you just gently take off some of that debris, you're just.

Lian (45:47)

Hmm.

Londin Angel Winters (46:03)

So I'm blown away by how quickly things are opening.

Lian (46:10)

Mm. Yeah, that really makes sense. was brought present as you were saying this to the, as you say, the sort of twists and turns that the polarity world has taken and how even the reason to practice, the reason to devote to it has kind of got a bit distorted. for want of a better word, kind of commodified and reduced in itself. I was, as I was listening to you, was thinking, yes, the more you go back to the kind of the truth, the simple truth, that calls people who are actually there for that, are devoted to that as a practice, as opposed to for example, just having great sex.

Londin Angel Winters (47:10)

Absolutely, well and that relates to the thing you said about that inner marriage. So one of my foundational teachings with my women is that your inner marriage creates your outer marriage and I'll give you a simple example of this in my life. So if things get off with Justin, rather than me feeling that like urgency, that reactivity, fix it, like, what are you thinking? Hey, what did you mean by that comment? Can we talk about this? Like, you know, you can hear the reactivity in my system. I have learned if I'm worked up, it's not the time to go work this out with him because I'm in, I'm unaware, I'm insensitive and I'm reactive. Like I am codependently needy, I wanna fix, I'm...

Lian (47:47)

Mm.

Londin Angel Winters (48:06)

It's like everything has to change now. If there's all that urgency in me, I've got my own work to do before I even address this with him. So I will just, I mean, it can be as simple as just going to the bathroom, having a moment to bring my witness, my seer in relationship with my feeler. And I'll just show you what this would look like in a moment. So let's say we just had like a, at a meal and I went to the restroom and I sat. down and I just said, Yeah, I went to the.

Lian (48:36)

You're allowed to call it loo now, remember?

I made you an honorary Brit!

Londin Angel Winters (48:46)

So let's say we had a little squabble at the table and it got tense and I went, uh-oh. And then I escaped to the loo and I had a moment and I brought my awareness online. So we'll call this the seer. And so I just take a moment, close my eyes and I say, I have my seer, which is like the witness observing the moment, transcendence observing immersion. I see you're scared of losing his love.  And then I bring my feeler, you know, the one that's immersed in the moment. I feel misunderstood and afraid. And then I go back to my seer. So this is alpha holding omega. This is literally the two body practice, but I'm doing it with my own seer and my own feeler. So then the seer says, I see.

Lian (49:20)

Hmm.

Hmm.

you

Londin Angel Winters (49:45)

You wanted to have a really nice moment with him and it's not working the way you wanted it. And then my feeler melts. I feel seen. I feel loved. Now I've got union.

Lian (49:52)

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (49:58)

I've got sacred union going on between my seer and my feeler.

Lian (50:02)

Hmm

Londin Angel Winters (50:04)

So I'm taking a moment away and I've reestablished my seer loving and seeing my feeler and my feeler trusting my seer. Because remember what creates polarity is trust and love in union. So you can see my seer is loving my feeler and then my feeler feeling like there's room for her trust that seer.

Lian (50:21)

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (50:33)

What does that remove? All of my reactivity. Like I'm back in unconditional love. I'm back in divine union. I'm back in my strength as a woman. I'm back in my strength as a love driven being. And so I walk back to the table overflowing in true radiant love, surrendered into true radiant love. And then instead of saying like, honey, what are you, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm,

Lian (50:38)

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (51:02)

Right? Any of those responses that I would have been a moment ago, I say to him, I miss you, babe. I wanted to have a yummy date night and I see we've gotten off track.

Lian (51:13)

Hmm.

Londin Angel Winters (51:15)

And now my heart speaks to his heart and he melts and says, me too, love. Me too. Let's, let's do this again. Now we went from being opponents. We went from being codependent to like love is leading the way. Consciousness is leading the way. This is truly what it looks like to live in the practice. I mean, it's

Lian (51:37)

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (51:43)

not more complicated than that. And we have all these couples that are practicing this. We get texts like we're on our dream vacation in Turkey. We were sitting in a cafe. started getting, we started falling into our thing and we just did an ICI feel and we're back into our best vacation ever. You know, it just, it gives you the technology to just tap into the higher self and relate from there and then make love from there.

Lian (52:02)

you

Londin Angel Winters (52:13)

And now all of that performance stuff just seems like fun candy, but not the point.

Lian (52:20)

Yeah, I love that so much. There's, we're kind of, we're basically up on time, but I'd love to hear you just say something about this before we close. the word that you've said over and over again during this, this episode is, is about being a practitioner. And there is something  think so, so vital in that, you know, again, if we're truly on a path, a spiritual path, ultimately that is what it's all about. And we may, it may overflow into other roles, like you say, being a teacher, but it comes from being a practitioner of your own spiritual path. And again, that going back to the kind of intention of this episode, that is not about, having a great relationship, although that is part of what can be created. It's not about having the best sex, it is about being a practitioner of a spiritual path. before we close, is there anything else you feel you would like to add to that about this idea of like this, this is a practice and I'm a practitioner of it. I would love to hear any final thoughts you have on that.

Londin Angel Winters (53:42)

Hmm.

When you decide to have your partner become your guru.

What it means is I've committed to this relationship and I'm going to show up in every moment and I'm going to be as aware as I can. Sensitive, meaning like willing to feel, take a full breath down into the belly and feel what this moment feels like. I'm willing to be aware of myself and you. I'm willing to consider you in this equation. And non-reactive, I'm willing to unguard my body. and meet this moment without immediately trying to fix it, without immediately trying to change it. I'm willing to give it the dignity of allowing it to be what it is. This is how you grow sexually and spiritually with your chosen beloved. Now, if you don't have a man yet, and I have tons of female clients that haven't met the man yet, They're already practicing for their beloved with themselves. Like I just taught them in the loo, you know? And that's what I love most is this practice is available to everyone. And when you're doing this practice as a single person, you attract way better people. You know, like your inner marriage creates that outer attraction that brings in the right people.

Lian (55:07)

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (55:14)

the ones that are wanting to grow, the ones that want to awaken with you, the ones that want your feelings to be something that they treasure rather than resist. You know, it is a wonderful, wonderful journey to be a practitioner of this work above everything else. And the resources are available to do it. Is it for everyone? Not even a little bit. It is the hardest of the hard, but

Lian (55:23)

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (55:43)

To be able to bring conscious love to at least one human being is a paradigm shift that ripples across the entire collective, across the entire planet. And more importantly, settles your soul like, yes, this is what I knew, this is what I intuited I could feel in this incarnation. And having even one taste of that is worth it.

Lian (56:11)

I'm glad I asked you that last question. Sometimes I think, well done for me!

That was one of those moments.

You

Londin Angel Winters (56:37)

I can tell you I've never had this much fun on a podcast and I'm just positive that I have mascara like pouring down my cheeks from laughing so hard.

Lian (56:47)

You look absolutely radiant, you really do. my gosh. So before we collapse into laughter again, not quite yet, where can listeners find out more about you and your wonderful work?

Londin Angel Winters (57:00)

Well, you know, the best place to learn about us is our books, because that's where you find out whether this path is for you. You know, long before working with us in person. And the first book is The Awakened Woman's Guide to Everlasting Love on Amazon. The second book is Playing with Fire, The Spiritual Path of Intimate Relationship, also on Amazon. And the Playing with Fire book has an audiobook, which people love.

Lian (57:08)

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (57:28)

that's narrated by Justin and I so you can hear us telling the stories and whatnot. It's really great. People really love that second book. They treasure it because it's got a whole practice guide. Our intention with the second book was to set you free in the work. You would never need to work with us to be able to begin the path. And then if that's something that calls to you after you read the books, we have monthly groups on Patreon. We have a women's group, a men's group, and a couple's group.

Lian (57:28)

Hmm.

so much fun.

Mmm.

Londin Angel Winters (57:57)

that meets every month and deepens in the work. And then we do in-person workshops and whatnot. the place to start is on Amazon with the book and kind of see if it resonates, right?

Lian (58:07)

gorgeous. Yeah. And as I was saying, I haven't read your, I haven't read Playing With Fire, but I will now. But having read The Awakened Woman's Guide to Everlasting Love, have I got that right? You just have such a, such a beautiful way of bringing things to life. You know, there's just such a honesty and attention to detail that makes it like such a

Londin Angel Winters (58:23)

Mm-hmm.

Lian (58:37)

You know when you read books and you feel like you are just there being transported to the scene, you have a real way of writing that does that. yeah, I strongly recommend reading your books.

Londin Angel Winters (58:44)

Hmm. 

Thank you. Labors of love, labors of love. My favorite thing to do is to write and create that relationship with the reader. So that's really where my heart's joy is. So I appreciate that feedback.

Lian (58:50)

Hmm. Mmm. Yeah,yes, it's so clear that's the case. Well, this has been an absolute joy. We did manage to calm ourselves down to, yes, I think we went into all the places that I was hoping we would go and some more. So thank you so much.

Londin Angel Winters (59:22)

Hmm, so glad. It was such a joy.

Lian (59:24)

I very much hope you enjoyed watching that and if you did and you're not already subscribed then do hit that bell thingy and subscribe to automatically get each fresh new episode as it's released each week. If you'd like to find out more about the work we do at Be Mythical to guide and support old souls in this new world to live their own unique myth…

Do hop along to bemythical.com and you'll find out all the ways you can join us and go deeper with us on your own mythical journey.

Lots of love for now.

See you again next week.

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